GNH Community

Community, Nonprofits and Businesses sharing Information

16 Ways to Fall in Love with Yourself Part 1 of 3

Photo Credit: Fellipe Ditadi

On a recent call with a private client, she said, “I am falling in love with myself!”

I cannot tell you how unbelievably awesome that makes me feel! My heart is swollen with pride and love that I get to shepherd her on her journey to self-love. Mind you, that was only after four weeks of working with me!

What I want for all of my clients, and everybody in the world really, is that they grow to love themselves. Here are some tips for how to fall in love with yourself that have worked for me. They’re not in any particular order.

It will help if you think of it as building a relationship with yourself. If you were falling in love with another person, you’d do things to let them know you care. You’d treat them well, and let them know you’re thinking of them. You can do that for yourself too!

1. Get help for your addiction. If you’re addicted to a substance, whether it’s food, drugs, alcohol, or perhaps you have a process addiction like sex or gambling, get help. You will not have a high-quality life that you love when you’re using. You don’t have to go it alone. There are over 200 12-step programs, and there are tons of resources out there no matter your income level. Here’s a page on my website with some recommendations I have.

2. Stop judging yourself so harshly. Most people believe in being kind and loving to others and giving them the benefit of the doubt. Yet when it comes to ourselves, we hold ourselves to a much higher standard. Here’s the thing, you are FLAWESOME! Just because you have flaws, doesn’t mean you’re not also awesome! Give yourself the same love and kindness you give others. Cut yourself some slack for a change. That self-judgment isn’t shaping you into a better person. You'd just end up battered and bruised.

3. Reparent yourself. Even if you think it sounds hoaky, give it a try. The deep and profound healing I’ve experienced through my reparenting journey, especially in this past year, has been astounding. I can’t tell you how much fear and emotional pain I’ve released. Not to mention forging a real relationship with my inner family.

Reparenting can be as simple as being good and kind to yourself like a loving parent would be. It can also be very complex where you create a whole cast of inner characters and recast your past. To get started, I highly recommend getting your hands on a photo of you as a child so you can look at it regularly and say loving things to the picture. You might also try to connect using non-dominant handwriting. Write to your inner child with your dominant hand, then respond using your non-dominant hand. I don’t know how it works, but it does! Somehow doing that bypasses the adult part of your brain. Start with “getting to know you” comments and questions and see where it goes.

4. Mirror work. This was super awkward, but also super powerful! Look at your eyes in the mirror and say loving things to yourself. When I started this, I was very resistant. But I was committed to changing my ways and that meant I had to try new things. I decided the thing I needed to say to myself was, “I love you just the way you are Barb.”

I didn’t mean it at first and I cried while doing it. And I kept doing it. That meant I was telling myself, “I love you even when crying ‘for no reason,’ even when resisting doing this work, even when feeling weird and awkward.”

Eventually, it got less weird and awkward. Eventually, I stopped crying. Eventually, I meant it. And now, I very regularly (at least once daily) catch my eye in the bathroom mirror and say, “I love you Barb, just the way you are.” Now, I’m typically grinning an impish grin when I do it.

5. Take care of your physical body. You are an animal. You’re not a machine. And animals need care. They need consistent sleep, food, water, activity, and relaxation. We were meant to move. So move your body, and stop ingesting things that were not meant for consumption by animals. Or at least start adding things that are good for you, whether that’s healthy foods, consistent movement, or sleep. Just treat your body as if it is beloved, even if you don’t feel that way just yet.

Over the next two weeks, I’ll share parts 2 and 3 with some additional ways to fall in love with yourself. Remember that this is a journey. Most people grow in love with others, they don’t really “fall” into love immediately. So be patient with this new lover of yours.

For most blog posts like this go to

Views: 13


You need to be a member of GNH Community to add comments!

Join GNH Community

Welcome (Bienvenido, Benvenuto, Powitanie, Bonjour! Willkomme,歡迎, ברוךהבא أهلا وسهلا, Bonvenon) to GNH Community. Traducción de esta página

Si no habla inglés, puede
leer el contenido de este sitio
web haciendo clic en
"Select language" arriba y
eligiendo "Spanish".
El contenido, excepto los
archivos adjuntos, aparecerán en español.


Non-English speaking residents can read the content of this website by clicking on "Select Language" above and picking their preferred language. Once a language is selected all content with the exception of attachments will appear in that language.


Imagine. Inform. Invest. Inspire. Working together to build a stronger community - now and forever.

The Community Foundation office at 70 Audubon Street is open to visitors by appointment only; Foundation staff are available by phone and email Monday through Friday from 8:30 a.m. - 5:00 p.m. to conduct business or to schedule a time to visit. To contact a staff member, view our staff directory.




Open Street Project

An Open Streets Family Reunion: Reflections from the 2018 Open Streets Summit

By Ryan O’Connor, Director of Programs, 8 80 Cities Recently 8 80 Cities wrote a blog post about open streets being a labour of love. That being the case, the 2018 Open Streets Summit in New Orleans felt like a family reunion of sorts. It was rejuvenating to see old and new friends who share our passion for open streets and are working tirelessly to create healthier, happier, and more connected communities across the world. The event, which took place on September 15-16, brought together more than 50 leaders who currently organize open streets programs or are interested in bringing the...

The post An Open Streets Family Reunion: Reflections from the 2018 Open Streets Summit appeared first on Open Streets Project.

Open Streets Summit Draft Agenda

We hope you are getting ready and feel excited about the Open Streets Summit in Gretna/New Orleans! Taking place from September 15-16, 2018, the Summit will feature tours, presentations and networking opportunities with open streets champions and organizers from across the continent. Attendees will learn about the nuts and bolts of starting or scaling up open streets programs, including: Route design and planning Partnerships with business and officials Social inclusion Safety and logistics Marketing and promotion Program evaluation through measurable goals and metrics If you haven’t done it yet, click here to register for the Open Streets Summit only or...

The post Open Streets Summit Draft Agenda appeared first on Open Streets Project.

Open Streets Summit Speakers Announced!

The Open Streets Project is proud to announce that Ed Solis from Viva Calle (San Jose, CA), Romel Pascual from CicLAvia (Los Angeles, CA), Jaymie Santiago and Charles Brown from New Brunswick Ciclovia will join us as speakers for the 2018 Open Streets Summit in New Orleans and Gretna! Taking place from September 15-16 2018, the Summit will feature: Behind the scenes tour of the City of Gretna’s inaugural open streets program. Workshops, presentations, and networking opportunities with open streets champions and organizers from across the continent. Training and inspiration for both -novice and experienced- open streets organizers and supporters...

The post Open Streets Summit Speakers Announced! appeared first on Open Streets Project.

Local Initiatives Support Corporation

Affordable, Sustainable Housing is Coming to Long Beach, California with Help from LISC

As inventory shortages and high costs are making Long Beach, CA nearly as unaffordable nearby Los Angeles, $4.34 million acquisition and predevelopment loan from LISC is helping the construction of a new affordable housing community to move forward and provide a range of apartments for families earning 30% AMI to 60% AMI.

To Safeguard Homes in California, Promote Affordability Through the Foreclosure Intervention Housing Preservation Program

California’s recently formed Foreclosure Intervention Housing Preservation Program (FIHPP) is poised to fund nonprofit housing groups to buy rental properties in or at risk of foreclosure and quickly convert them to long-term affordable housing. Now, FIHPP is hanging in the legislative balance. LISC’s Tahirih Zigler and Enterprise Community Partners’ Jacqueline Waggoner weigh in on the imperative of safeguarding the program to help spare many Californians from the preventable tragedies of displacement and homelessness.

Jorge Cruz Returns to LISC Greater Newark as Executive Director

LISC has named Jorge Cruz as executive director of LISC Greater Newark, a decades-long community investment program that has delivered more than $169 million to New Jersey neighborhoods, businesses and community organizations to support economic opportunity and growth.

© 2024   Created by Lee Cruz.   Powered by

Badges  |  Report an Issue  |  Terms of Service